Does it affect energy levels when we “zone out” our feelings?

Lots of us like to think that if we just ignore the hard situations we have encountered in life, they won’t affect us. Over the years I have found this idea simply doesn’t work, for two basic reasons.

Firstly, our brains are wired to go looking for things that are physically and mentally not quite right for us. So, while we’re trying to switch off to a difficult event, the brain goes looking for it in the background, without our full awareness. That takes energy.

Secondly, the very act of pushing a memory away, takes mental energy too, and can also cause memory problems (switch one thing off and other things follow).

It’s best to find a way to process stuff we find difficult – it’s the change process.